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  • hayley cagan kamis

Real person, real-time, really necessary.


Hi there. My name is Hayley, and I’m a live person typing on my computer in real time. Crazy, right? I promise I won’t call and pretend to be a computer eliciting auditory information programmed to respond in different ways commensurate with your responses. No false representation – I am 100% human, with flesh and blood, multiple organ systems and a brain floating within my cranium.


That’s right, I said cranium. See? I’m educated, too.


I won’t waste any of your time. You are free to scroll, delete, ignore or read at your discretion: the choice is all yours and you maintain full control. Unbelievable!


In addition, I’m not only human, but I’m humane. And I have excellent communication skills. Understanding that communication is an interactive sport, my job is to listen, confirm information, provide feedback, acknowledge your concerns and interests, and respect your time. But that’s only the beginning! I see you. I hear you. I am interested in what you have to say and share, because you are human too. Sounds crazy, but it’s true.


Even better, I do this not because I’m trying to sell you something, to influence your decision to choose my services over another vendor, or to promote the illusion that I can assist you without caring about you. I am simply committed to my responsibility to deliver on the mutually and apropos expectation of giving as well as receiving. Because I receive when I give: I open a door to hearing a new story from a unique individual who has information to share that I can learn from, too. It might even make me better at my job, whatever that is.


You have my undivided attention, because that’s why we’re in communication: to be present to each other. I’ll ask questions so that I won’t jump to conclusions. Before making any assumptions…wait a minute, I just won’t make any! Instead, I’ll consider everything you express, whether in words or facial expressions or tone of voice or body language. If I’m unsure I’ll ask for more. And I’ll tell you all this with my words and facial expression and tone of voice and body language. It’s that human thing, remember?


I understand the world and its inhabitants are moving at lightning speed. The rules and their interpretations are changing, which feels very disorienting and disconcerting. And because we’re people, we get distracted, frightened, and forget that there are people in our world – healthcare practitioners, legal consultants, educators, businessmen and women, employers, employees, peers, families, friends – who are human, too. Sometimes they forget that we’re here to be with, around and for each other as well as for ourselves; believe it or not, many of them don’t even know.


But I do. And you do. And we know how important it is to show up, speak up, listen up, and buckle up. That last one is the law; the others are optional but highly recommended.


So, you do you and I’ll do me, and we can both give a little wink-wink that we get it, the big “IT”, without listening for the options that may have changed in the recently updated automated prompts. The point is that we're listening to each other - period. No matter what the spreadsheets, focus groups or social media say, that last part is invaluable. That's one rule of nature that will never change, no matter how hard we try.


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© 2018 by Hayley Cagan Kamis

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Hayley Cagan Kamis, MA, CCC-SLP, RM/T-IARP